Three years ago I was the most scared I have ever been. I put an end to my biggest fear by letting the people I love most know who I really was. By coming out, I made a statement that I would not let self-hatred and shame have power over me, and I was ready to move towards happiness. Three years later, I realize how that day marked the beginning of a new season where I actively worked to make my dreams come true.
I don't know what my life would be like if I had given in to my fears on that day. I felt terrible about disappointing my parents. I knew I was breaking their hearts and killing their dreams for me. On the other hand, I was finally being honest, and I owed them that. I wasn't really killing their dreams because they were never going to come true anyway. Really, I was just breaking the news.
Now I wish I had done it much sooner. Obviously people delay their coming out because of fear. Sometimes it's justified, especially if you depend on the "coming outees" for shelter, a job, etc. But at the same time, I think we too often misjudge and underestimate them. I feared losing all my friends, being kicked out of my family and losing any chance at building a career. But, my family stuck with me and my friendships got better. Most relationships actually got a lot better, mainly because I was finaly truthful and real. And now that I think about it, I really don't want to be friends with anyone who prefers a front instead of the real deal.
Three years ago I took my life to a whole new level and now I live my dream.
